you're a masochist for falling for me.

i love her right now. she makes me want to cuddle with someone, relax in my bed, sleep peacefully and kiss. kiss softly on parted lips and on closed lips and on eyelids and on cheeks and on foreheads and on and on and on....


i wish celibacy were easy but i'm hopeless. i will never, ever, ever be able to be celibate; it's not even really celibacy. it's an abstinence from relationships in general. it's not even really because of you anymore; it's because of me. it's because i need to straighten out my life. i need to completely clean the cobwebs from my head.


i can feel myself starting to work. i can feel my heart beating again. i was numb to everything; now i'm alive again.


you'd be lucky to have me. in all cockiness, i'm probably wonderful to be in a relationship with. not perfect, by any means. but if i feel something deep for you, you'll know it*. you'll feel it deep within you. i know what i want and i'll go for it with all my heart.


ingrid michaelson? i feel her staying on continuous repeat for a couple of days. her voice is amazing.


[*= besides getting past the initial "i like you" part. i'm a pansy when it comes to that. initiation by the other person is necessary.]