when it was over, all i could think about was how this entire notion of oneself, what we are, is just this logical structure, a place to momentarily house all the abstractions. it was a time to become conscious, to give form and coherence to the mystery, and Ii had been a part of that. it was a gift. life was raging all around me and every moment was magical. i loved all the people, dealing with all the contradictory impulses - that's what i loved the most, connecting with the people. looking back, that's all that really mattered. - waking life.